Monday, October 5, 2009

Weekend Warrior

Man! Oh man!
What a weekend!
Heck... was a week!
First of all, let me just start out saying that last Wed... was UNEVENTFUL!!!
That's a GOOD THING!
That being said... Thursday and Friday were very eventful.
As most of you Mama's out there know... it is impossible for us to be in two places at once, let alone 4 places at once... so Thursday, between football practices, John's baseball practice at school, Will's Football game, and Bill's pre-op, the day was a logistical nightmare!
But I figured it all out, it all got done, and we ended up that evening at Will's football game.
He played every single minute... offense AND defense... in the heat... and got a personal foul.
Some overgrown maggot got a hold of both of his legs, after a play, and Will tried to shake him off, and the stupid zebra's (ref's) called a foul on Will and not the hanger oner.
Everyone saw that it was OBVIOUS he didn't kick the idiot on purpose... but a foul was called nonetheless.
His coaches were pissed... and I told his coaches to take a chill pill... I told them anyone would have done the same thing if someone had their legs in a choke hold... AFTER A PLAY!
They chilled... he has to do 10 gassers today... and I told William to do them with a smile on his face... gladly... knowing he wasn't being malicious during the game.
Thank God the weather had cooled down about 20 degrees.
Friday was the real day of interest.
Bill had his Vasectomy.
After nine years of putting it off!
Nine years of playing russian roulette.
Nine years of 'taking precautions'.
It's finally all over.
One would have thought that Bill's lips were pulled out ten feet, shoved into his nostrils,
pulled out his rectum and tied into a bow at this neck.
He has been eating Tylenol three at a time every four hours like clockwork.
The ice packs, the complaining, the stories of what that evil doctor did to him and his jewels...
the sheer horror of it all...
Walked withing 4 hours of each of them... only took two Tylenol after each one, nursed a baby, and when I got home did the laundry, washed the dishes, made dinner... all while recovering from hormonal meltdown, and an 8 inch incision!
If I hear... one more time... how sore he is and how much the doctor took out, and how the doctor pulled and how the entire time he wasn't numb, it didn't work, he had to take the pain as is!!!
No WAY!!!
There is definitely a reason we women have the babies.
Our threshold for pain is miles above theirs.
A paper cut sends my man into a state of demise.
A cold is the plague.
A fever is Scarlet Fever...
a zit is a tumor.
They didn't give him stiches... and he was upset about that.
{{the hole is like...1/2 a centimeter... how many stitches would it have been??? one?}}
He was incensed that they "left it open"... to drain.
After hearing that for the eleventyth time... I told him that I have seven layers cut
when I had his children... and I lived... he would live too.
In truth... he has been way better that I thought he would be, but he did seem to be in alot of pain. We had to skip a surprise party on Saturday, because a longish car ride would have been too much... but he is back to work today.
While he was in having his procedure, I met the most fascinating women in the waiting room.
More on them in another post...
All is well... my ear is all better,
Bill has been neutered,
Alex is back home and had a blast,
and I am home alone all day again...
Ahhh... bliss... thy name is work and school.


  1. Oh, I just hate when refs get it wrong!

  2. kimberly SaucedaMonday, October 05, 2009

    I was wondering about Bill ALL weekend! Haha! I so wished I had your cell phone to text you or call you! Tell him to suck it up like a man!! Haha!! Just kidding Bill! I can't wait to read your blog about our two lovely women patients. They truly are there own person. Those two have a whole lifetime within their hearts. Don't forget about that wonderful lady sitting behind the counter, just kidding, just kidding. Thats not my usualy spot, I usually work downstairs in our own room. Was glad to see you guys!

  3. sounds like you were busy this weekend. Hubby's are so funny about their packages. I hope he is a little less annoying today. LOL

  4. I say 'HOORAY' for you!! After 3 C-Sections myself, I had them tie my tubes while they were in there the last time. I knew my husband would be the biggest baby! So, as most wives do, I handled things myself to make sure they were done right! But I applaud you for holding out, and getting your man to step up!! Way to go!

  5. Saundra, I'm SO jealous! Hubby can't handle a headache or pulled muscle; I couldn't imagine asking him to get snipped.

    The Baby was breech making my tube-tieing easy I also requested my appendix out and a tummy tuck since I'd be there and, well, go to go, but the doc wouldn't do it). Wasn't too happy when he (the doc) told me we still needed to use "precautions" until I hit menopause because the procedure ISN'T 100% FOOLPROOF?!?

    And only reason I got more than Tylenol for any of the births was I had brochitis when I had the Baby (and c-section) and I went with the 600 mg Ibuprofen with the magical Codeine in it! Should I send you some? It will numb the pain of listening to him whine!

  6. I'm cracking up over here. You described the guys very well. I can't even go into the "man cold" or the "man allergies". Geez. Hope he's feeling better soon.

  7. Why, oh why, are men such babies!!!???

  8. I'm impressed he went through with it. Mine wouldn't even consider it... He is the BIGGEST man baby on earth!


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