Writers Workshop 10-8-09

The prompt for this week is...

'WHEN I LOOK IN THE MIRROR'...

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When I look in the mirror, I don't see what everyone else sees.

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When I look deep into my eyes, I still see the young girl who dreamed of becoming a professional

dancer, of having multiudes of people clapping and cheering for her.

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I still see the naive, starting to come out of her shell, Sandee, who was unsure of herself some of the time, and stayed true to herself, no matter what came her way.

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I see the young girl who wondered who her husband would be, what her children would look like,

and whether I would have a career, or raise my kids, or both.

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I see a girl who wanted to do everything she dreamed of.

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I see a girl who thought it was impossible to fail, if I really tried.

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I see a girl who had so many questions, and very little answers.

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I see a girl who was steadfast in her faith in God, family and mankind in general.

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I see a girl who was also skeptical, wary, and was always looking for the "catch"

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I see a girl who, early on in life, knew and realized that if it sounded too good to be true, it most certainly was.

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I see a girl who kept her virginity to herself a lot longer than most girls she knew.

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I see a girl who felt sorry for other people because they didn't have my awesome Italian heritage, and would never know how wonderful it was to be in an immigrant family.

I see a girl that didn't realize that EVERY heritage is awesome.

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Then... with new, older, wiser, keener eyes, I see who I am now...

a woman, not too different from who I used to be.

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While so many other women in my life are striving to retain a youthful APPEARANCE, I choose to BE, ACT AND THINK youthfully.

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I see a woman who stills listens to music a little too loudly, and loves all the new, "kid" music out these days, as well as the music I grew up loving.

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I see a woman accepting herself... right. where. she. is... and is trying to improve her health, vitality, and overall well being by continually being teachable, and continuing to learn.

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I see a woman who is over weight, but not overlooked, over accomodated, or overcome by her circumstance. She is. She will be better tomorrow than she is today. It's just the way it is.

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I see a woman who is done with listening to other women bash eachother.

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I am done with hearing that women "dress" for other women.

I dress for me.

I like to wear black.

Sue me.

If you don't like my clothes, my hair, my shoes, my lifestyle, my career choice, my husband, my kids, my candor, my house, my car, my politics, my belief system, my... anything... take it somewhere else please... I can do without the negativity.

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I see a woman who wants to raise good, women honoring, respectable men... who know that showing a woman she is cared for, revered, respected and loved, doesn't make him less of a man.

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I see a woman who knows how blessed she is that all her parents and inlaws are alive and well... and really needs to see them more often... just because.

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I see a 41 year old, flawed, happy, fluffy, married, work at home Mama, who still dances with delight when no one is looking, loves with all her heart, and is still cynical and skeptical,

still asking "what's the catch?", still dreaming, still believing I can do anything I set my mind to...

with the help of God, family, and my children.

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I wouldn't go back to that little girl for all the gold in the world...

She is still here...

She never left...

She just grew up... and found her way.

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What do YOU see in the mirror?