New Series... My Life in the Passenger Seat...

Holy HELL!

My son turned 16 on Monday.

He's a great kid.  Kind, courteous, studious, handsome, smart, athletically inclined, and he loves his Mama...

Like I said... he's a GREAT KID.  So we bought him a truck for his 16th Bday.  We were sooooo excited!  His school requires freeway driving everyday... and since he's at school 12-14 hours a day for various sports and clubs... it made sense to us to get him a car... so we can have a life too...

WHAT THE HELL WERE WE THINKING!...

He got his permit a little late... I was tired of his lackadaisical attitude at the beginning of the school year to turn in the homework we worked so hard to complete... so for every missing assignment, I pushed the date of his Permit test one month.  So he missed two assignments... which meant he had to wait 2 extra months to take his test... it doubled when he got a tad bit too lippy with me one fine day... so he didn't get his permit until April... last month, it took a couple of months for his schedule to loosen up to actually take the online class.

He started driving my car, with me, almost everyday, in town, on the way home from school.  Just here in our podunk little town.  Stop signs, easy turns, no traffic... pretty easy.  He did a GREAT job.  A GREAT JOB!  I was soooooo happy that he was doing so well.  In my mind... I was thinking... "Oh yeah... he's gonna do GREAT!  He "gets" it!!!" I didn't have to raise my voice ONCE... I was a calm, cool and collected Mama... which, by the way... IS NEVER the way I am described... EVER!

Then... THEN... I must have LOST MY DANG MIND!  He got his truck on Monday... and he texts me every day to drive his truck to school when I pick him up, so he can drive it home... cool.. no problem. 

EXCEPT that his loving Father... on Sunday, while on a Home Depot run to get a new lock for his bed cover (Tono cover?), he, of course, let Will drive his own truck, and was coaching him about braking easier.  Apparently Bill thought he was braking too hard.

So the next day... I get into the passenger side of the truck, and my other two boys get in the extra cab... and Will is driving home from school... on his Bday.  And I notice... that we are approaching a new Lexus ahead of us... very, very quickly.  Here's how the conversation took place...

Me - 'Uh Will... time to put he brakes on, honey... that car isn't moving... it's a red light."

Will - "I know Mom... I see it... Dad said not to brake too hard... I'm stopping."

Me - "Uh... You're not stopping fast enough... stop the car Will... push on the brakes..."

Will - 'I AM MOM... Dad said...

Me - DAD ISN'T HERE... HIT THE DAMN BRAKES NOW! PUSH ON THE BRAKES NOW!!!

Will - I AM!

Me and Alex and Johnny - BRAKE NOW WILLIAM.... HARD!!!!

We end up stopping 1 foot from the car ahead of us.  I could SWEAR I saw the fear, whites and eye shadow color of her eyes...

When we got home... I hugged him, apologized for yelling at him... and slugged his shoulder.  I grabbed his beautiful face and asked him WHY ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH DIDN'T HE PUSH ON THE BRAKE to stop the car?

"I was just doing what Dad said... easing on the brake." 

I had a dilemma here.  I DO NOT like it when women demean their husbands...especially to their children... so I said... "Okay... but I'm sure he didn't mean THAT EASY.  I need to FEEL MY SEATBELT when you drive... Capisco? Brake EARLIER than you think you need to!"

Here's what was  REALLY being said in my head... "WHAT?  YOUR DAD DRIVES LIKE A MANIAC! Don't listen to him! He drives like he's got a woman about to give birth and man dying of heart attack in his car... just to go around the corner!!!!  But I didn't say that to him...  I would never diss my hubby like that...

Oh wait...I just did... huh?  Good thing he has an AWESOME sense of humor!!! Love you honey!!!

Stay tuned for more adventures of My Life in the Passenger Seat... or also known as.. "HEY... NO!!! MIRRORS MIRRORS... CHECK YOUR BLIND SPOT... DON'T TURN THERE!!! NOOOOOOOOO!"