Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Me and Oprah are like this!

Okay... Oprah must be channeling me. She had the SAME topic I have been harping for years!
Parents that are always "yes" parents... and how they ruin their kids!
Let me just start out by saying...
I am not an Oprah follower like I know so many others are.
I tape her show every day... but only watch about 10% of the ones I tape.
It freaks me out when so many people deify a celebrity.
She's cool, but not my be all end all.
I DO, however, LOVE, ADORE AND ALMOST WORSHIP (not really, but you know)
Suze Orman.
I own every book she has ever written.
She is THE money guru.
She makes the MOST sense.
Her ideas and ways of investing and doing things are the reason I WILL be financially
healthy and happy when retirement rolls around. I just know it.
She is a Money goddess.
I want her to be my cool, quirky, gay Aunt!
Money is a HUGE issue right now.
For the past 8-10 years or so... it's been spend, spend, spend.
Parents have been throwing thousand dollar party for babies.
Credit cards have been used like they are cash.
No one thought about how long it would take to pay them off, as long as their kids got the coolest this or that on the block.
It is all such a mess!
Now!!! All of a sudden, parents have decided to become real parents and not their kids
shopping buddy and 'best friends'.
That whole..."I want to be my kids friends, the cool mom, the one that is hip and with it!"
Those same kids talk back to said"parent friend" like they are trash!
Here's my philosophy on raising my kids.
If you were to ever ask them... they would be able to quote this verbatum...
Will, Alex, John... I am never going to be your friend.
I will always be your Mama.
It will never be okay for you to curse around me, yell at me, or be disrespectful to me.
I know people tell you that respect is earned... but not when it comes to me or your Daddy.
We gave birth to you, feed you, send you to lovely private schools, clothe you, buy you what you need and occasionally what you want, and provide a pretty nice shelter over your head.
I think that's worthy of respect for respect's sake.
Never mind the fact that we love you more than our own lives, and would do, move, kill, maim, stab, deliver, give a terrible limp to, or just slap ANYTHING OR ANYONE that tried to remotely hurt you in any way, shape or form.
I, however, am not here for a popularity contest.
I don't care, and will never care if you like me or might be mad at me at any time in your lives or mine.
I will never buy you things so you'll forgive me for something.
I will only say I am sorry and ask for forgiveness.
I am not perfect. I will never be perfect.
I am trying to make you the best men this world has ever seen or heard, and sometimes I am tough on you and expect more from you than you think you can give. I will always ask you to do something that us just outside your reach... then you will grow and know more for having accomplished it.
You will never get an allowance just for being alive.
Money, in our home, will always, always, always be earned.
How else will you learn to work for what you want.
In the real world, no one just hands money to you.
Well, the welfare system does, but you won't be going down that route.
You have never been raised to get something for nothing.
Marry orphans... so I will be the only Nana.
So that is how I have always been.
That's how I was raised.
I get so much flack for expecting so much from my men.
My Papa always said while I was growing up... (in an Italian Accent)
"Nevera trusta or marrya a mana that don'ta havea callousesa ona hisa handsa... he hasa nevera seen a harda daysa worka."
He didn't like "softa" men.
He meant to make sure I married a man that could take care of things.
Fix things, build things, make things, create things.
Nowadays, women need to take care of things too, and be strong and take charge kind of women.
I think my Papa just didn't want me to get stuck with a guy who was wishy washy.
Jumping from job to job, not really making money to do anything financially responsible with.
I don't want my men to be like that either.
I just really hope they don't marry a girl who had "yes" parents all her life.
These times right now are ripe for lesson learning.
So many teens are gonna be in a world of hurt for a while now that they can't have whatever they want.
They'll get over it. They'll be better, stronger people for it too.
Is it any wonder that the generation that lived through the Great Depression has always been known as the Last Great Generation? They had the most moral fiber, worked hard, made do,
invented what they didn't have, and expanded our world beyond measure?
Yeah... life wasn't handed to them on a silver platter.
They were better for it.

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