Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Tuesday... just Tuesday.

Didn't My Melissa look stunning last night?
Holly who is finally gone.
The Woz is gone... I loved him. What a great attitude he had!
Mr. Naked Man is stunning... just to look at, and his dancing. Yowza!
Shawn is sooo good. Her partner is so sensual with his partners... I hope she doesn't develop a crush and get her heart broken... she is so young. He is sooooo awesome.
L'il Kim is getting less and less gangsta every week. She's growing on me.
And jackA** boy... well... so glad he's sober... but he's gotta go.
The Football player does too. Notice how they were much nicer to him this week? The producers must shake in their boots when a celebrity gets mad.
David Alan Grier? He just makes me laugh with every word he says. I love deap pan comics.
This weeks tribute is to all the women out there married to men. All of you, us, we.
The fact that we can stay married to them with for so long without killing, maiming, hurting, or smothering said men with pillows IS A FREAKING MIRACLE!
Yes, I am perturbed at my man.
Never mind why... let's just say... that this week, he has saying one thing and doing another, and I've just about had it.
All those women in State Penitentiaries across the US.
Was it PMS?
Was it self defense?
Was it sheer unadulterated anger?
Was it the lack of respect of her sleep?
Was it his inability to see that YES... INDEED, THE WORLD DOES HAPPEN TO REVOLVE AROUND HER?
Was it his snoring?
Was it an affair?
Why did they go that one extra step?
I used to think they were lunatics.
I used to think they were stupid, scared, disrespectful women.
No more.
I get it now.
They snapped.
Their husbands KEPT on doing what made them crazy.
I love my husband. I do... most of the time even.
But this last week.
This last week he's had a cold.
Oh my GOSH!!! One would think he had contracted TB, Bubonic Plague, Scarlet Fever,
Meningitis, Influenza, Rabies, Parvo (lol), a paper cut, and
Montezuma's Revenge ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
How is it that he can skip work, lay in bed all day long, whine, and snivel, and scuff along the entire house... then at 5 p.m.
the stroke of BASEBALL PRACTICE... he is up, dressed, ready for anything the world throws at him... THEN... after practice... he is back to dying again.
Can anyone tell me how I came to have 4 boys and not only 3?
We have been together 19 years on Friday (married 17 in October)
and when he has a cold... I SUFFER THE WORST OF IT.
When I have a cold... he still has his meals, his kids still get picked up from school, his clothes get washed, and I am still up at the crack of stupid oclock.
Why can't a 45 year old man handle a head cold?
This morning, after I made him sleep in the family room with all his stuffy head and snoring in my face business, he was mad that he wouldn't be woken up when his alarm went off.
Well, at 4 a.m., his alarm went off, I woke his butt up, and at 6 a.m. when MY alarm went off, I fully expected him to be gone to work... THERE HE WAS... ON THE COUCH... STILL SLEEPING... IT took EVERYTHING I HAD IN ME NOT TO GRAB A PILLOW AND... WELL.. YOU KNOW!
It's perfectly okay with Bill if I get up with his alarm and do what he asks... but he doesn't have to follow through... as long as I am inconvenienced... he's fine.
That's how I feel.
I know you feel my pain.
I know you do.
Oh, I hope my boys don't grow up to be like this.
My poor daughers in law.
Rant over.
I'm sending this to him today.
Have a WONDERFUL DAY dear!
Ya might wanna hire a food taster today...
of course...
sparkly things in small boxes cures all ailments...


  1. Bwahahahaha!

    Oh, I'm sorry, I wasn't laughing at your situation. My cat was tickling my feet. Yeah, that was it, my cat. (snicker, snort)

    Hope things get better. Do I need to send you an extra firm pillow?

  2. Hahaha! Yes, I've got my own over here. And I'm in the process of trying "not" to raise the tween boy in the same way! But I have a feeling, I might be a losing that battle.

    On to more enjoyable subjects...
    Yeah, Mr. Naked Man was "stunning"!

  3. Sing it sister!

    I always did love little boxed sparkling "apologies"

  4. OMG! This was so me last week!

    A couple of weeks ago I was sick...I never missed work, the house was clean, meals were cooked, the kids where taken care of, etc...

    He was sick last week and missed two days of work and stayed in bed doing NOTHING all day! He never got up to let HIS dog out!

    Don't let me keep going.....you sure nailed this one :)

  5. you gotta check out my dancing with the stars recap... I'm still so rooting for Melissa/Gilles finale... wouldnt that be awesome!

  6. I don't watch this show, but I did pass by it one evening and saw that the Playboy chick, Holly was on it. GAG!

  7. So funny about the man. Mine is the same way when he is sick and he mopes and shuffles around like he is the only one who has ever been sick EVER! Moms dont get sick!?! Yah right.

    I do have to say though that after I got really ticked the last time he was sick he has tried harder to not be such a baby about it.

    Loved the rant.

  8. men do not do sick well, I am convinced that is given to them in the Guy handbook no female has ever laid eyes on.

  9. Sick men are babies!!! My hubby has a "cold" and is just about on his death bed! Men! You love them, but really!My 6 year old is sicker than him and is at school. My 8 year old is throwing up, but making it through...Men!?
    I got a good laugh today...

  10. Men suck MORE than snack bars!!!


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