This particular post will deal with
I was in line last week, at Ross, purchasing some goodies for myself and my Mama, and a friend of mine, I haven't seen in a while, caught my eye... so I left the line to go talk to her.
We were happy to see each other, did the hug thing, the air kisses, lots of smile... but genuinely happy to see one another.
She asked me how I was and my family too.
I said "Great".
And asked... "How are you?"
She too said... "Great".
Made some small talk, commented on my basket full of non essential items, just stuff I saw and wanted, and put in my cart. I thought nothing of it.
She kept asking me what was new... if I had anything to tell her, was I holding back...
I wracked my brain... said no...(I really didn't know what she was talking about)... then she asked me to think really hard.
I was getting a little weirded out... but couldn't, for the life of me, figure out what she was getting at. So I came out with it. I asked... "What's the deal? Do you know something you think I am not divulging?"
She said... "Well a little birdie told me you are going to be doing some remodeling, and you made a big purchase lately."
(It was soooo not a big purchase)
So I said... "Oh yeah, we are adding another master suite and a big bathroom to our house.
(Our bathrooms are soooo small right now... you can sit, take a shower and wash your hands... AT THE SAME DANG TIME) (If I lay down in our "master bathroom now" I touch it end to end...so... yeah, we need the room.)
And we bought a few other things that Bill has wanted for years.
So, I owned up to them, had forgotten all about them, because the remodeling is a need, and much cheaper than buying a new house, and the purchases weren't important or noteworthy, so I didn't think of them.
THEN... she said these words to me...
"Saundra... don't you think... in these uncertain, economic times, that it is in POOR TASTE, to make big purchases and remodel your house?"
I just stood there...
Staring at her...
with a quizzical look on my face...
wondering... A) was she really saying that... and B) What business was it of hers?
"Well... Georgia, it's not like I am a cast member of Real Housewives of NYC for God's sake!
I didn't know it was in 'poor taste" to shop and buy things one needs or wants! My car is 6 years old, I have no credit card debt, no debt at all, as a matter of fact, not that it's any business of YOURS... where do you get off?"
THEN she says... "Well, I just got laid off my job, and I think it's insensitive of you to talk about all the things you are buying... to me"
I said... 'BUT YOU TOLD ME FIRST... YOU MENTIONED IT!"
She says... "Oh... yeah... I did, huh? "
I just stood there, with my arms outstretched and a bewildered look on my face, shaking my head...saying... "uh... yeah!"
So my question is...
Is this what we have become?
A few years ago... everyone was racking up debt by the thousands, buying $900 purses they couldn't afford and foregoing children's dental hygiene for the same purse...,
buying houses some idiot says one can afford, even though it's 2000 sq ft too big and $2000 more they one can afford...
and now it's my fault that it all hit the fan, and I am not supposed to shop anymore and buy things I CAN afford, (Hello I was at Ross, not Nieman Marcus) because she was laid off, and other people are jobless or had to sell the house they couldn't afford and live in something they can afford? Really?
I had no idea I was being rude.
I had no idea that remodeling my house would make someone elses self esteem plummet.
(By the way... all the labor is being done by Hubby and the kids...) so please!
Is this the general consensus these days?
Everyone has to be quiet and purchase and go on vacation on the down low?
I, for one, would be heathily envious of someone that could do those things in this economy and would want to try and duplicate what they are doing!!!
After our conversation... I was quickly reminded of WHY we haven't seen each other as often...
I was making a conscious effort to avoid her...
I had just forgotten.
Gotta get better at it... gotta practice more...
Next time I'll just wave and smile.
Who needs that!