Saturday, February 7, 2009

Saturday Rant.

What is going on in our country?
I am going to make a statement, and I don't want to offend anyone.
What I am about to say is NOT a blanket statement, by any means, about the 30 and under crowds of the world. I know there are exceptionally wonderful people that are under 34 years of age... and I know some of them... but...
There... I said it.
No dissrespect to the under 34ish crowd... really...
My generation didn't grow up with CD's, cell phones, Ipods, skates on shoes, talking, puking, pooping dolls, daycare centers in schools, or even remote controls for TV's until we were in High School!
We had to play outside, come in when the lights went on, talk on land lines, have our parents screen our calls to the house, look things up in a dictionary, say please and thank you,
say yes ma'am, no ma'am, yes sir, no sir, put our hands out for hand shakes.
We were reprimanded if we were disrespectful, expected to do chores for free,
flabbergasted if a girl was a teen mother, and wondered where she went for 7 months and mysteriously reappeared to graduate.
Call me a prude.. call me old fashioned... but I long for those days again!
I was in a store the other day, and my checker was chewing gum, and talking on her cell phone while scanning my stuff. I stared at her the entire time, mouth slightly open, wondering when she was going to finish her convo. When my total came up... I could have just glanced to my right... but I kept right on staring at her.
She gave me a sideways glance to "tell" me my total was on the little screen. I raised my eyebrows in amazement... and didn't budge.
Then she says this... "I have to go Kirsten... I have to tell this lady her total, before I melt from her stare."
She put her phone down, fake smiled at me and said... "$126 will you pay MA'AM"
To which I replied...
"I'll pay your manager... can you get the Manager for me please... little girl."
She instantly looks a tiny bit scared and say's "Sure... no prob."
Manager comes over... looks about 19, still has acne, and asks what the problem is like this...
"Becky, are you having a problem with this customer?"
I was incredulous.
I was the one at fault in their eyes.
Remember when the customer was always at least given the benefit of the doubt?
Yeah... those days are over!
I said... very low and calmly, with no inflection in my voice...
"I was just wondering about our policy on checkers talking on the cell phones and making snide remarks to customers while scanning customers items. Is this your normal policy? To allow personal calls during work hours... is that what those little cheerleader meetings in the shampoo aisle are all about when I'm in there at 8 a.m.?"
Manager Katie just said... "Noooo".
Ugh... this was getting worse by the minute.
I just said... "Fine... I'll pay and go, but I need the address of your headquarters. I have your name, and yooour name... the date is Feb 6th, and it's 8:45 a.m. The store number is?"
I got my info, and got almost to the end sliding doors when I was stopped by security.
The nice security guard asked me to hang back for a second... for the manager.
I told her I already spoke to a "manager" and she laughed at my Air Quotes.
She said it would all be cleared up in a jiffy.
She used the word jiffy. I knew she was from my era.
I waited.
Another woman came to my side... asked me to step into her office, the security guard would watch my things.
I obliged. I had nothing to hide, and I was damn curious.
When in her office, she closed her door, introduced me to her colleague, and apologized for the inconvenience. They had seen the little Tete' a Tete on their surveillance screen, and wondered why a regular employee, not a Manager was called over to assist.
They had seen the phone call girl, and were watching her. They said they could tell by my staring and reaction to her that I would want a manager.
When one wasn't called over, they got more involved and watched it all unfurl.
Yes... big brother IS watching...
I felt relieved!
Yeah!!!! Someone WAS on my side!
They said they have seen this kind of thing happen a lot... employees making little pacts with each other to "act" as manager for each other, so as not to get into trouble. They shoplift that way too, taking advantage of new employees.
They wanted me to make a statement so they could fire Becky and Katie.
I wouldn't. I told them no, because they need to be taught customer service skills, and if they just fired them, it wouldn't teach them anything.
I used to work retail at Clothestime for 4 years, and was a Manager of it for 3 years.
Customer Service is a learned art for some.
Some people are taught basic manners at home... I quickly came to find out that that isn't the case with many families.
It was their responsibility, since they hired the girls, to train them in the way they wanted them to be. If they don't comply,.. THEN fire them.
I excused myself... they offered me $25 gift certificate, I accepted, and got my goodies and walked up to Becky and Katie, and told them I was a secret shopper and they just failed horribly, and if they get to keep their jobs... they had better learn from this experience.
They just stared at words.
{No, I'm not a secret shopper, oh, how I wish I was!}
As I get older, I notice more and more complacency in places of business!
I know I can't blanket statement all people under a certain age... but... SOOOOOOOOO
many parents these days only parent by buying their kids things and not making waves, and making sure the little darlings are HAPPY!
Then we all have to pay the price of the incompetance, and put up with rude, thoughtless,
no sense of culpability type people.
I hate it.
I work so hard, every single day, to teach my kids how to do every little thing that matters.
I want them to be exemplary employees or employers, to do what is right, to say please, thank you, have a great day, etc... to have a work ethic, and to know that you can't get money without work!
It doesn't seem to be a priority anymore in our country.
Have your seen Lynne from Real Housewives of Orange County?
Totally clueless, and so is her oldest daughter.
America!!! Use this economic disaster as a blessing to get back to basics... and
Please... no hate mail from the 30 and under crowd... I LOVE AND ADORE YOU, YOU LINE FREE, TIGHT BUTTED, PERKY BOOBED WONDERS!
I'm not talking about YOU! I'm talking bout THEM!
Rant over.
I'm gonna go make Calzone's now.


  1. I am under 30, but I totally agree with you. I would have been JUST as pissed and would have complained JUST as much. I have worked in retail for a long time...I was at WalMart for a while and then almost 3 years at Bed, Bath and Beyond....and I even got pissed at some of my fellow employees in their "customer service skills". I have seen things like this happen before. It really irritates me!

    Also, I agree, a lot of parents lack discipline skills and want to just make their kids happy...oh lord does it bug me. I even see it in some of my friends...and I just want to take them to the side and be like, PLEASE discipline your child...please. I have even disciplined them myself...and the parents are like, oh thanks, sure you can discipline them. WHAT THE CRAP.

    I applaud you for this post! :)

  2. i just love your blog. you are so much like me its crazy. I am just getting use to using the computer and blogging. I am 37 and have a hard time with the way the younger generation treats anyone over 30, so disrespectful. Nobody these days seems to even give it a second thought though. Glad i am not a alien afterall. I look forward to reading your blog. Salute-

  3. It's getting so bad around here with that kind of service that there are certain places I just won't go. You are a better woman than I, I probably would have let them get fired. Wouldn't it be great to get back to mom and pop stores like in the small town where I grew up?

  4. Saundra while our politics may differ to a degree our parenting does not!!! I do work daily to ensure my children learn manners, how to act in public, and how to treat others. Granted my boys came to me 2 years ago with zero of these things including table manners, grr.. However, even my boys who spent 4 and 6 years not learning these things have learned them well. Parenting is not easy but we are to be parents not friends to our kids.

    I also discovered through wonderful friends who are teachers and our own disasterous experience in the public school system last year that teachers are not allowed to work on correcting non manners.

    I am clapping over here saying amen because manners and respect never ever ever go out of vogue!!!

  5. This is a tough one for me. I have shared my views on parenting with you before. you know I am tough and don't do the "whatever you want baby, just stop whining thing." I time-out and spank butts and never ever reward bad behavior. I don't make idle threats, I follow through and I mean business. BUT I am not a yes ma'am no ma'am kind of mom. I don't require my kids to call adults Mrs. or Mr. If you came over today, I would introduce you to all my peeps and tell them, "This is my friend, Saundra." I am convinced this must be a utah thing. Because here in Cali I get all sorts of looks and every other child calls me Miss Benson. I correct them and say please call me Sandi. I then learn their parents won't allow them to. I am like What the Hell?

    So, my version of manners may differ from yours, but my kids are nice sweet kids, and if they aren't, they will be sorry!

  6. I am 30 but couldn't agree more. I am tough on my kids probably tougher then my parents were with me. I have expectations of them and they have great manners. I can't stand how some of the teenagers are behaving lately. I will never allow my children to be doing some of this stuff. I am so glad that you got your voice heard and $25 isn't to shabby either.

  7. Good on you Saundra. We are breeding spoilt monsters. It all comes down to teaching people respect for themselves, others and their possessions. And most of all that there is a consequence for every decision they make. Go sign up for mystery shopping - you can do it online. You'd be great at it.

  8. To all the 30 year olds... thank you for commenting... I didn't mean you... I just picked an age that was lower than mine, 40.

    I have many 30 yr old friends that think like I do, and have great kids.

    The kids at the store weren't 20 yet... I'm sure.

    Sandi... I totally feel you... and I never meant to imply that kids that don't say Ma'am and Sir aren't good. I meant in a business setting... Ma'am, Miss, and Sir are necessary for respect.

    VickyLynn, Mel, Kim, Lilly... Grazie'! Te'Amo!

  9. You and I are clearly of the same generation because it was a totally different world then. We took such great pride in our measly little minimum wage jobs and people actually dressed up to go to work back then. It's just unreal how things have changed out there.

  10. Oh my gosh, you are soooooooooo right on here sister. I think more people should react the way you did.... they need training, then to get fired (as I'm sure they still will be at that point). But my God, I'm so glad after reading that... that you got the opportunity to speak to the "real" Manager. There is so much to say but you've said it already. Amazing. Amen. We need to unite and kick their asses into gear because their parents aren't going to! Oh, and yes.... Lynne. Wow. I don't really know what to say about her. She is an idiot and her daughter needs a big ass kicking.

  11. Loved this post!! I too have been so irritated, but haven't spoken up in a store, so good for you!
    I am 37, and my hub. and I both are working so hard with our little boys. I always quote the "golden rule" to them...I still have work to do, because my five year old said today, "Do unto other AS they do to you." Oops. There is a few more important words in there!

  12. I know what you mean! I get so ticked off when I go into a store and spend hundreds of dollars and get to witness the "sacker guy" and the "checker girl" talk about their weekend plans. UGH. There is a time and a place people.

  13. I am 33 and I totally agree with you about parenting and customer service. We had to get up to change the channel then we had that cable channel box changer with all the push buttons ~ha! I remember UHF and VHF and fine tuning away the "snow" ~ haha! We had land lines and it is funny to me b/c we had no call waiting just the busy tones that kids have no clue about nowadays! We bought our own cars, gas and paid our insurance. I started working when I was 10. I didn't have a cell phone ~ a giant one at that ~ until I was in college and it was for emergency use only not b/c I broke a fake nail but if I was in a wreck or the car broke down. I remember spankings and groundings but nowadays all the kids have too many luxuries and feel far far far too entitled to them. I get sick of the gasps when I tell people I actually still spank my boys. It didn't kill me! I am a responsible adult and proud of it! I will be a failure as a mother if my children don't grow to be responsible, hard working adults! We didn't have a "choice to work" we HAD to work. I bought my own school clothes after 13 and if I wasn't working and I was allowed to go out with friends my Dad in NO WAY handed me money. It is sad really! I had a situation JUST like yours at TJMaxx with a cashier just a few years younger than me BUT she NEVER did get off the phone even while I flipped out on her! I did write the corporate office and I never shop there anymore BUT that will probably not affect them in anyway. Corporate america doesn't care as long as they are getting money but what will it be like when the irresponsible, entitled people are running the world. I pity that day ~ we think the economy is bad now ~ how about when they run things! I work for my father and we go through employees like you would NOT believe. The only part-time help we can find is teenagers and they are VERY VERY HARD to train to do proper customer service when NO work ethic has been taught to them. IF they actually show up on a regular basis, they aren't worth the time to train b/c they don't care to learn. They don't care to get fired b/c it is their easy way out then mommy and daddy will pay their way. Sad really but it ALL starts at home! Great post! Did you ever get my blog to work?

  14. I REALLY wish you would stop with the ranting, thought provoking posts b/c they get me all uptight then I leave you comments that end up the size of a post! Sorry about all of that! Your fault really since you made me think! Ha! I just love your blog!

  15. Good for you Girl,take that $25!! I cant stand checkers nowadays. I am constantly getting in the wrong line and get the rudest checkers. I HATE STATER BROS. they have thEE WORST checkers ever. No manners,rude...I wont complain though,just wont go back.some Parenting classes should be manadatory before they're released from the hospital.Maybe then, we wouldnt have these disrespectful,pot smoking,no manner having drop outs running the streets.keep your head up.

  16. Tonia... you said Stater Bros... are you near me? I tried emailing you personally, but you are a "no reply" person, and you have no profile...

    Angela... you can leave the long posts any time you little heart desires... I love'em

  17. *standing up and applauding*

    I am in love with you. :-D ;-)

    "...many parents these days only parent by buying their kids things and not making waves, and making sure the little darlings are HAPPY!"

    Evidently this isn't me because my kids are always crying. :-p

    I am only 32 but I remember buying 8tracks in my twenties ON PURPOSE because I love the good ol days and my first car had an 8track player. uh huh thats right... factory installed baby. LOL.

    I buy my kids cassette tapes from the thrift store and I don't buy that 100% available all the time. If someone calls my house and I'm on the phone they will get a busy signal.

    I worked in the grocery industry and it is all about customer service. I rock at it by the way. Always make each customer feel as if they are the reason you showed up for work. Thats the way I saw it anyway.

    I LOVE this post... send it in to parenting magazine or something... more should read it.

  18. Good for you girl. What an excellent way of handling the situation. I loved the "I am a secret shopper" line. I am going to remember that one. You should send this into Reader's Digest, hey, could be good for another $25.

  19. This 32 year old couldn't agree more. My parents raised me the way you were raised. They made it a point to do so. I will be raising my boys the same way. I love your posts. :)

  20. Well I guess I am the youngest one here, 19 to be exact. But I couldn't agree with you more, I have had to speak to quite a few 'managers' but the one that stuck out the most was a gothic dresses blue and pink hair pierced lip 17 year old. Not a real manager. The lady who scanned me out was not on the phone but she kept complaining that she was tired and she never got her lunch break today, and a bunch of other things.. Ugh! it drove me insane. I wouldent mind seeing more ma and pop shops either. The farm we have in WV has one down the hill witch i love....
    I came from a pretty spoiled home then she kicked me out...But Im trying to raise my boy with out all that( exept for the cell phone, incase of emergancy,but hes gonna be under strick supervision with it) hahaha Love your posts!

  21. LOL, How did I miss this post?
    lol My niece is 21, works in retail and makes the same complaints about her

  22. I first started skimming through this post but when I kept thinking "Mmm-hmm that's right!" I decided to just go to the top and start over. Great post. I am totally shocked by that behavior. When I'm the ::customer:: I don't even talk on my cell phone during check out because I don't want to be rude to the cashier.
    Whip those girls into shape! ;)

  23. okay, im completely computer retarded,Ithought i sent you an email but it didnt go through, i,m at , Tonia


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